So at my last appointment my blood pressure readings (yes, they took multiple) concerned the doctor. She asked that I check my bp at home and keep a log and return in a month for a recheck.
Today was the recheck.
I arrived with plenty of time, thought happy thoughts of waves crashing and the beach and all kinds of happy shit.
However when I was taken back and my bp was taken it was even higher than any previous recordings.
When the doc finally came in she basically told me I can't stay on birth control pills. I need to get my blood pressure under control first and then we can come back and discuss another hormone replacement therapy protocol. She told me she can't keep me on birth control, which keeps my menopausal symptoms away, because I could have a stroke.
So basically I am juggling staying on birth control and risk having a stroke vs going off hormones and risk my bone density and brain cognitive functions for the rest of my life.
I mean, I know what needs to be done but I am having a lot of anxiety knowing all my menopausal symptoms are going to hit me like a ton of bricks once I miss tonights dose of hormones.
I guess I just feel defeated. I physically feel like shit. Mentally I know I'm going to feel like shit once I am off the hormones. And I literally can't do anything to help any of that right now.
So, I am off to find a new (closer) primary doctor. Once I can get into a new practice and have them look into my blood pressure issues I can eventually revisit hormone therapy with my OB. Until then I'd probably stay away. Crazy is coming to town and she can't be stopped.
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